


Are You Gonna Be My Guy?

by meridian_rose (meridianrose)



Series: Be My Guy (modern college au) [1]
Category: Da Vinci's Demons
Genre: Alessandro is awful and uses a gay slur, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Community: trope_bingo, Discussions of sexuality, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Lorenzo is awful, Lorenzo uses a gay slur and participates in asexual erasure, M/M, Photography, Questioning, Relationship Discussions, Trope Bingo Round 8, background Clarice x Lorenzo that ends badly, background Vanessa x Giuliano
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-26
Updated: 2017-06-26
Packaged: 2018-11-19 10:08:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 17,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11311164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meridianrose/pseuds/meridian_rose
Summary: The relationship study sounds like a perfect way to some easy money for Zo, if he can find someone to fake monogamy with him for the duration. Zo's stunned when Riario offers to be his partner since his father cut off his funds.While things are initially awkward Zo discovers Riario isn't as stuck-up as he thought and Riario finds the study prompts him to reconsider his sexuality and his ambitions.Somehow the uneasy acquaintances become genuine friends…and maybe more…it's supposed to a temporary deceit but the more time they spend together the more they discover how compatible they are.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> For the trope bingo prompt "au: high school/college"; this is a generic and fictional USA/UK college experience rather than a specific or truly realistic setting.
> 
>  
> 
> [Tumblr promo post](https://meridianrosewrites.tumblr.com/post/162286201042/meridianrose-are-you-gonna-be-my-guy-the)

* * *

"You could get a job," Leo suggested.

Zo scoffed. "You first."

Zo had worked at a food truck all summer to fund his studies while Leo had sketched caricatures for passersby (and somehow made nearly as much as Zo).

"I'm not the one so desperate as to come up with a scheme like this."

Zo leaned on the canteen table and sighed. "Who's Nico dating anyway, to turn me down?"

Leo shrugged. "Maybe that was just an excuse. I'm not making excuses, you'll notice. I'm just telling you that no-one will believe we're in a relationship."

"We were!"

"That was not a relationship. That was just friends with exceptional benefits." Leo slurped his coffee. "Besides it says right here that you have to have been monogamous for six months. No-one will believe that of me. I am the epitome of the slutty bisexual, a disgrace to my sexual orientation. Every one knows that at college alone I've shagged Vanessa, you, that bloke from drama class, you, Lucrezia, that Colombian anthropology student whose name I can never remember, Lucrezia, you, Lucrezia and, er, shit, I'm forgetting someone. Anyway, six months is a long time in my world."

"Or at least your bed," Zo groused. "Fuck, Leo. This is easy money. Relationship study. All I need is a partner."

"A pretend partner, who is willing to pretend to have been with you for six months and to pretend monogamy with you for a further six." Leo frowned, deep in thought. "What about that girl you picked up a few weeks ago?"

"She lives off campus, taking care of her kid brother, and working double shifts whenever she can to make ends meet. That's more responsibility than I want, and she doesn't need my drama."

Leo stared at him. "That's very mature."

"Cowardly, maybe."

"No, it shows good sense not to get involved with someone when you know it can't work out." Leo sighed. "I wish I had that much sense. Next time you see me flirting with Lucrezia, punch me in the nose?"

"Gladly," a gravelly voice said.

Leo looked over Zo's shoulder and Zo shifted in his seat. Girolamo Riario, dressed all in black as usual, was seated behind them. He had a political science class with law major Nico, and an intermediate Italian language class with Zo who was majoring in Language Studies, while Leo had dated Lucrezia - Riario was on the periphery on their social circle, not part of it.

"Little late to protect your cousin's honour," Leo called.

"Perhaps not too late to prevent you from further despoiling yours," Riario replied. "Do you want a future shackled to Lucrezia? I'm sure you have grand plans. Travel the world, perhaps."

Leo shrugged. Riario moved to join them, taking the seat next to Zo. He pointed to the flyer.

"You're interested in the psych department's relationship study."

"I was," Zo said. "But my so-called friends won't help me out."

Riario tipped his head. "Perhaps I can be of some assistance."

"What, pretend to be my lover?" Zo laughed. Leo giggled. Riario remained stony faced.

"Wait, you would?"

Riario nodded.

"I could do with the cash," Zo said, "and if there's extra credit, I'm all over that too. But you don't need either. Why would you want to help?"

Riario shifted in his seat. "I am currently experiencing some cash flow problems. The study will bridge the gap."

"You need the money? Did daddy cut you off for, for...fuck, I can think of five things I did last week, and three Leo did last night that would make a father cut off funds, but you're a fucking altar boy."

Riario lifted one shoulder in a shrug. "It is a temporary issue that will be remedied shortly, certainly once my father discovers what lengths I will go to in order to earn money." He gestured to the flyer. "But if you do not want my assistance…"

He made to stand. Zo's hand shot out and grabbed at Riario's wrist. Riario glared at him and Zo moved his hand.

"All right," Zo said. "Let's give it a go. I mean, they'll probably see straight through us anyway."

"Straight," Leo snickered. "Sorry. But you should at least try and convince them you're a couple. You need a meet-cute."

Riario frowned. "A what?"

Zo waved one hand in the air. "You know, a cute story about how we met or started dating. Like I was upset because I'd got caught in the rain and I really wanted a hot chocolate but I didn't have enough change, and you took pity on me and paid for my drink."

Leo beamed. "Nice. Or you could have a meet-ugly, like I accidentally threw up on you and we ended up in the bathroom cleaning each other up."

Riario gave them both a look. "Or Zoroaster wasn't paying attention in Intermediate Italian and asked to borrow my notes. That seems plausible."

"Don't see what wasn't plausible about the others," Leo grumbled, upset none of his ideas were being considered, "but have it your way."

"That's what he said," Zo replied automatically and he and Leo dissolved into giggles.

Riario stared at them and then at the ceiling in hopes of divine intervention.

"Of course there is one problem," Leo said. "You have to be living together for the duration of the study. It says so on the flyer."

Zo frowned then gave a shrug. "Move in with me," he said to Riario. He took a huge mouthful of coffee. Shit, did he actually just ask that?

The student accommodation was all pretty much the same anyway, so it wasn't as if Riario would be downgrading. Each of the buildings housed six rooms to a floor with a communal kitchen. Each room slept up to two people and came with a small ensuite bathroom. The furnishing was basic but functional; single beds with one set of beside drawers each, one wardrobe, one desk and chair, one shelving unit. Leo had turned the top of his shelving unit into a mini kitchen so he could make hot drinks without leaving his room.

Riario lifted an eyebrow. "How clean is your room? Because I've had the misfortune to see Leonardo's room when I've come to talk to Nico about an assignment and sometimes there is no visible floor."

"I'm nowhere near as bad as Leo," Zo promised. "I'll even tidy up before you move in."

"What about your room-mate?"

"Amerigo got kicked out last week for not attending a single class," Zo said. "What about yours? Awful Alfie."

Riario didn't react with anger, as might have been expected, but a resigned calm. "Is that what you call him?"

"Well, yeah. He's kind of a dick." Zo looked to Leo, who nodded.

Riario tipped his head. "I think it's worse than that."

When he didn't elaborate Leo sighed. "If you're going to play at being boyfriends, you need to open up about things."

"To you also?" Riario asked.

Leo beamed. "I'm Zo's best friend, so I'm part of the package."

"Lucky me," Riario said, in the tone of one being handed down a prison sentence.

"So, Alfie?" Leo prompted.

Riario considered for a moment. He leaned forward and lowered his voice. "I think he might be a rapist."

Zo took another swig of coffee to get his head around that. "You sure?"

"No. But last night, some of the things he was saying...never outright admitting to anything of course." Riario shook his head. "Let's say I would not be heartbroken to move out."

Leo scowled. "We ought to do something. Warn women away from him. I'll talk to Vanessa and Nico, we can spread word through all our classes and clubs."

"Put an anon message on the forums, maybe," Zo said, stroking at his chin. "Isn't there a thread about that, the missing chair?"

"The missing stair," Leo corrected.

"So you're not a fan of Alfie?" Zo asked.

Riario shook his head. "Our fathers know each other, strings were pulled, and I got a roommate who thinks that I am just like him."

"You're not?"

A dark look crossed Riario's face. "I am not a rapist."

Zo shook his head. "Of course not. I meant you're rich and entitled and a bit of a dick."

Riario leaned back in his chair. "Is that how you talk to your boyfriend?"

Leo giggled again.

"I meant – well, come on. You are rich and entitled and...shit." Zo sighed, watching his chance at earning money being flushed down the toilet because he couldn't keep his mouth shut.

Riario gave humourless laugh. "You and Alfonso both judge me without knowing me. But I know him. He thinks he is more handsome and charming and intelligent than he is. He has no regard for anyone or anything other than his own ego. I assure you, I am not the same as him."

Zo believed him. There was an intensity to Riario's words, a desire or a need for Zo and Leo to acknowledge that Riario and Alfie were different. He'd had no idea that Riario resented Awful Alfie. Riario was, on the surface, Alfie's peer and so of course everyone assumed they were friends. And if that was poor judgement on Zo's part, he was willing to reassess. He knew what it was to be judged; wrong skin tone, financially lacking, pegged as a troublemaker even before he did anything.

"All right. Let's do this," Zo said. He held out his hand and Riario shook it.

*

The perky female researcher looked over their registration forms.

"So you've been together for seven months. That's with each other, no-one else involved?"

"We know what monogamy means," Riario said, with a tone that said he was being charming but if charming wasn't working out he could be otherwise.

"You'd be surprised," the researcher said apologetically.

"Standards are slipping everywhere," Riario said and this time flashed her a smile.

Zo leaned over and took his hand in a gesture of possessiveness. Riario's smile became fixed.

"And you are living together?"

"That was more recent," Zo said. "But yes."

She smiled. "That's fine. In fact we're looking for a variety of relationships, from those who've been together six months to those who've been together for two years or more, and we're taking into account how long you've been living together. It can change things, as you learn more about each other."

There was a quick outline of some of the things required of them, sessions with the research team, questionnaires and sometimes short essays, a few exercises to complete and report back on.

"If there's anything you don't feel comfortable answering, leave it blank and we'll discuss it at the next session," she assured them.

Then they were both given an information pack, which Riario would probably read and Zo probably wouldn't, but at least Zo had an excuse to let go of Riario's hand to take the paperwork.

"I can't believe that worked," Zo muttered as soon as they left the building.

"What did you think you were doing, grabbing me?" Riario hissed.

"Stopping my monogamous boyfriend flirting! And selling the lie! If we never touch they're going to ask questions, and we're not prepared enough to deal with the sort of discussions about intimacy it will raise."

Riario gave him a look which Zo assumed meant he was reluctantly conceding the point. "I wasn't flirting," he said, apparently needing to argue about something. "I was being polite."

"Be less polite," Zo advised.

Back at Zo's dorm room, Riario sat on his bed and began to read. Zo went to take a shower.

When Zo returned to the bedroom, dripping wet, Riario said, "We are allowed to refuse to discuss details of our sex life, but we are required to do talk about it in broad terms."

"Like, I can say we do it twice a week but I don't have to say who is on top?"

Riario glared. Zo sat on his own bed opposite him, refusing to be cowed. The room seemed smaller with Riario across from him. Riario was of average height and slim, but he somehow took up a lot of space. He'd unpacked with an efficiency that was startling and they'd taken about ten minutes to outline their basic story before they'd headed out to sign up for the study. This was the longest they'd been alone together and Zo was already starting to regret his decision.

"Yes," Riario said at last. "Like that. Does that seem sufficient? Twice a week?"

"Sex has nothing to do with being sufficient," Zo said, brow crinkling. "I mean, sometimes you want to spank the monkey a lot and sometimes not at all, and when you're doing it with someone else it's about how much they want to do it not jut how much you want to...you can't talk about sufficient or insufficient. It's intimacy. Fuck, I don't know. Average isn't average with stuff like this."

Riario returned to reading the paperwork while Zo towelled himself off.

"Kinks?" Riario said, in a choked voice.

"Lots of them," Zo replied cheerfully. "You know what kinks are."

"I don't have any."

Zo laughed. "Everyone has kinks. Things you like. Things that you enjoy thinking about or looking at. Even Dani has kinks."

Riario stared at him. Zo almost felt sorry for him, thrust into a debauched world. "Dani?"

"She and her girlfriend Sylvia are doing the study, so I heard. Dani's ace though. Asexual," Zo added before Riario could misunderstand. "No sexual attraction."

"Then how can she have a girlfriend or be part of the study?"

Zo sighed. "Romantic relationship," he said. "Doesn't specify sexual. Yes, there is a difference, no I am not going to explain it to you if you don't get it. Google it or something. Ask one of the gender studies students. Go to the library even. Look up kinks while you're there."

Riario put the papers aside. "I'm going out for a while. I intend to be back around eleven pm."

"Okay, Cinderella."

Riario glared again. "I think it is only polite to let my boyfriend know what time I'm due home, so he doesn't worry."

Zo nodded, contrite. "Point taken. You can text me though, if you're going to be late."

"If could if I had your number."

"Shit." That could have gone badly if it were found they didn't even have each other's contact details. Zo grabbed for his phone, numbers were exchanged, and then Riario took up his jacket and keys and left.

Zo tossed the towel aside and lay naked on the bed, enjoying the privacy. He would have to be on his best behaviour for a while. Riario probably didn't approve of being naked. Probably showered in his underwear like in The Sims or something. The thought made Zo giggle.

"They believed we are a couple, first huddle over," Zo texted, adding a second message, "*hurdle".

"LOL," Leo replied. "I thought you meant cuddle. What is Riario's stance on PDA?"

"Probably thinks it's a computer," Zo replied. "I held his hand today. It was weird."

"His hand was weird?"

"Holding it was weird," Zo typed, deleting before Leo got Ideas, and sending instead, "Holding his hand was weird."

"I think he has nice hands," Leo texted.

"Really?"

"Artistic. Could play music."

"Hand kink," Zo sent.

"I have All the Kinks," Leo replied.

"Riario say he doesn't have any."

"That's daft," Leo told him. "Everyone has kinks. Even whatshername. I let her play with my hair."

"Dani," Zo sent. "That's what I said. Everyone likes something."

"Bet it's really kinky," Leo offered. "Religious stuff. Flagellation or doing inadvisable things with cruciforms." A second message followed, "*crucifixes."

"Didn't need that in my head thanks," Zo sent. "Coming out later?"

"I've been out since I was eight, LOL. No, of course I'll come out, I want to hear all about the study. But will your boyfriend let you?" An emoji with the yellow face sticking out its tongue followed.

"He's gone out. As long as you behave yourself I don't see why we can't still hand out somewhere in public."

"Hand out?"

"Hang," Zo sent. "Fucking autocorrect. Pick me up at seven?"

"Sure."

Seven pm in Leo time was probably more like seven-thirty, which gave Zo plenty of time to get ready.

Zo got dressed and made himself a coffee, and did some reading. He made some notes, but he kept doodling, bored by the material, and fuck Leo because Zo was now drawing crosses and wondering about Riario's proclivities.

*

The second meeting for the study got a lot more personally invasive than the first.

"Is it all right if we talk about sexual intimacy?" the researcher asked.

Riario gave a smile that didn't reach his eyes. Zo beamed and hoped he looked convincing. They hadn't got pre-prepared answers for this. He hadn't wanted to push Riario into talking about sex when they'd only just moved in together and Riario was denying he had any sexual interests.

"Has your level of sexual activity increased, decreased, or stayed the same since moving in together?"

"The same," Riario said. "On both counts."

Zo nodded. It wasn't a lie after all.

She nodded, ticked a couple of boxes. "And you are both happy with your current level of sexual intimacy?"

"Of course," Zo said, and shit, he sounded desperate to his own ears. Luckily the researcher didn't notice, or she had an excellent poker face.

"Absolutely," Riario agreed, with that hint of charm that Zo had scolded him for previously. But if there was any chance Riario's mild flirting could keep the girl onside, so be it.

She smiled. "Have you had to negotiate around a new method of intimacy? For example, has one of you suggested a roleplay that the other wasn't entirely comfortable with, or the use of a new sex toy? I don't need details about what was suggested, but I am interested in hearing how you compromised, or if the idea was put aside."

Riario exchanged a quick look with Zo.

"I'm very much a novice," Riario said, taking the initiative. "Zo is the inventive one. For my sake, he is...very patient. We always talk about things before trying them. I've never felt pressured into doing something I did not want to do, if that's what you are suggesting."

She looked to Zo, who was still processing Riario's response. "Do you have anything to add?"

"Um," Zo said, not his finest moment. He was thinking about having a scenario that involved a discussion about dildos with a stern-faced Riario who probably knew exactly how they were made and how much they cost and what to do with them, but had never needed one thank you and was not about to try one now.

Did imagining such a conversation count as a fantasy and if so, as a sexual fantasy?

"Um," he said again, and rubbed at the back of his neck. "No. I mean, I would never want to push anyone into anything. Communication is key."

Riario laughed at the phrase. "You actually read the pamphlets?"

"Lucky guess," Zo replied. He winked at the researcher. "He's the responsible adult. I'm lost without him."

She wrote a few things down, but kept the clipboard leaning on her crossed knee, pointed at her chest where Zo couldn't make out the writing.

"You say you're a novice," she said, addressing Riario. "Can you expand on that?"

Riario licked at his lower lip. "All of my previous sexual experiences have been with women," he said softly.

"This is a very different experience, then?"

"Yes."

"And you, Zo?" She gave him an encouraging smile. "How do you feel about that?"

"I've had men and women," Zo said, slightly confused by the question. "You mean, am I worried that I'm his first man? Nah, it's like, it's almost a privilege. I get to show him things. I mean that – shit, what do I mean?"

Riario shot him a Do Not Screw This Up look. The researcher tipped her head.

"Take your time," she said.

Zo swallowed. "I don't think it's a problem for me," he said. "Maybe for him. But that's why we go slow. Why we communicate."

"Why neither of us wanted to rush into something as serious as moving in together," Riario added. "I am not someone who is reckless. I need to be sure of things before I make drastic changes. Zo is a drastic change."

He smiled and Zo would have sworn it was a genuine gesture of affection if he didn't believe that Riario was plotting ways to kill him when they got home. Maybe Riario fantasied about killing Zo. It would explain the odd looks Zo received sometimes, as if Riario was surprised that Zo was somehow still alive. Murder kink?

As they walked back home, Zo said, "You're scarily good at lying by telling the truth."

"It's difficult for someone to say you are lying when you're clearly not, and truth can be subjective."

"Still scary." Zo opened the door. Riario always waited for him to do so, and Zo could never work out why. Was it because Riario still thought of it as Zo's room and didn't like to use the key, to lay claim to the room? Did he like to watch Zo fumbling under his steely gaze? Maybe it was too much trouble to fish his own key from the pocket of the ridiculously tight jeans.

Zo was relieved when Riario agreed he wanted a coffee. He went to the kitchen and returned with two mugs. Riario was sat on the bed, waiting for him to return.

"I think we need to talk," Zo said, placing the mugs on the beside drawers and sitting opposite Riario.

"Are we breaking up?" Riario asked.

"What?"

"Isn't that the script for a break-up?"

Zo blinked. "There's not a script."

"I have been led to believe otherwise."

Zo entertained a brief fantasy of creeping up on Riario while he was asleep and prising open a panel on the back of his neck, proving that Riario was a robot or cyborg or something and not an actual human being.

"Fine," Zo said. "You're right it's a cliché thing to say and I shouldn't have said it because we are not breaking up. Or pretend breaking up from our pretend relationship. Or – you know, Leo would have a better idea of wording this."

"It's nice to know he is always on your mind," Riario snarked.

Zo bit down on his lip, hard, before he said something that both of them would regret. The worst thing of all was that Riario had a point. It wasn't the first time someone had pointed out how much Zo talked about Leo.

"So, what did you want to talk about?" Riario leaned back, relaxed yet expectant. Zo got the impression that one wrong word and he'd have a sharpened pencil pointed at his jugular. He rubbed at his neck and tried to come up the best way to broach the subject.

Zo reached under the bed, pulled out a bottle of whisky, unscrewed the cap and took a swig. He held out the bottle. He saw the minuscule twitches on Riario's face as he ran through his options, which Zo had outlined as (a) refuse because he was a fucking puritan, (b) refuse because it was "too early" or some bollocks, (c) refuse to drink out of the bottle and demand a glass because he was a fucking snob, (d) take a swig as per the social convention.

In Riario's mind it was probably more like (a-d) refuse to allow such low grade liquor to disgrace his palate, but it boiled down to the same thing.

Riario reached over and took the bottle, took a long swig. He licked at his lips. "Marginally better than I'd expected," he said, but it sounded condescending.

"You want better, you supply it," Zo returned. The whisky was supposed to help things along, not lead to more arguing.

Riario opened the bottom drawer of his bedside cabinet and wordlessly pulled out a hip-flask which he offered to Zo.

Zo took the silver flask, with Riario's initials engraved within a flowery insignia. He paused with the edge to his lips as a terrible thought occurred to him. Don't be ridiculous, he told himself. Riario wouldn't be so stupid as to carry poison around in something with his name on it.

It was good stuff, probably twenty five year old Scotch, and Zo fancied he could smell the sea and taste the heather-tinged breeze of the Scottish Highlands. He took another swig and Riario made no move to stop him.

"All right," Zo said, relinquishing the flask with some reluctance. "What came up today, that's one of the exercises in the pack. Yes, I did read some of it. There's a later one I'd like to address now. It says participants should talk about our previous sexual partners, if they haven't already. And our feelings about it all. Always about the feelings."

Riario nodded. "You are the one who pointed out there is a difference between sex and romance. I would argue feelings play a greater part in the latter, and that our discussions are what inform the researchers about how couples operate within their partnership."

Zo stared at him. "Do you always talk like that?"

Riario shrugged, took a swallow from the flask. "You wish me to limit my vocabulary?" The implication in the thinly veiled sneer was that if he did so, it was because poor dumb Zo couldn't understand him.

"No. I just wonder how much you say is what you – well, what you feel. Rather than what clever construction you come up with to hide the truth."

Riario tipped his head. "Not five minutes ago you accused me of telling the truth as a means of deceit. Now I'm lying every time I open my mouth. Which is it?"

Zo shook his head. He snatched the flask, took a long swallow. "Neither. Stop distracting me. Leo does it too, but better than you, mostly because he gets distracted himself and neither of us remember what we were trying to talk about. I want to talk about our sexual pasts."

Riario stayed very still. Zo was never sure how to react when he did that. He assumed it was a defence mechanism; fight, flight, freeze, and Riario froze while he considered his next move.

"I'll go first," Zo said, when the silence became unnerving. "I've had a few partners. Some men. Some women. Like I told the researcher. If I only count Leo once, then um, nine? Yes, you're my tenth. Would be. Whatever."

Riario stirred. "I thought the number might be higher."

Zo shook his head. "I don't sleep around. I'm a serial monogamist. That's part of why Leo and I don't work. I'm not keen on sharing, and he's not keen on feeling tied down. We keep trying but it doesn't last."

There was another silence. Zo looked over to Riario.

"Did you always know you like men?" Riario asked bluntly.

"I think so. People assume you're going to be straight. If you play games with boys, you're friends, if you play games with girls they're your girlfriend. But if you want a boyfriend you're told you're too young to know about such things." Zo shook his head, not enjoying the memories of his sometimes troubled childhood. "I was thirteen when I knew I liked boys the exact same way I liked girls. But my first was a girl, because I didn't want to have to be gay, you know?"

Riario was giving him an odd look. "Why?"

Zo gestured. "It's easier, isn't it, to be straight? No one calling you a pervert, or telling you they'll pray for your soul."

Riario was staring intently. Zo stood, because he was feeling unsafe now, and standing made him less vulnerable.

"It's no way to live though," Zo said. "Hiding who you are. Pretending to be straight when you're not."

"If you say so." Riario got to his feet. "I have to go to class."

It was a lie but Zo said, "Sure," and sat down again as Riario left.

Was Riario a homophobe? Or was it bisexuals he objected to? Because that was not a pleasant thought.

*

Riario stood in the doorway to the bathroom, eyeing Zo who was too busy retching over the toilet to care about the judgemental look on his room-mate's face.

"Hangover," Riario said dryly, when Zo managed to catch his breath.

"No. I only had two beers last night," Zo said. He hadn't even had anything questionable to eat. "There's that bug going around though."

Riario tipped his head, switching from superior to concerned. "Do you want me to take you to the health centre?"

Zo shook his head. He didn't fancy putting on clothes - he'd stripped down to his boxers when he'd felt hot before the vomiting started - nor attempting to walk across campus without immediate access to a toilet. Not that he ought to have anything left in his system to come out of either end.

"They'd just tell me to drink fluids," he pointed out.

Riario agreed. "Make sure you don't get dehydrated or I will drag you to the centre," he said. 

In fact Leo arrived ten minutes later, saying that Riario had ordered him to come and stay with Zo. Always keen for a good excuse to skip a class, Leo had jumped at the chance.

"I'll come and check on you as soon as I can," Riario said and finally left for class. He'd be a few minutes late and Zo was certain that had never happened before.

Leo suggested Zo take a shower. Zo protested but once he got in the warm water was soothing and afterwards, wearing a thin robe and nursing a glass of water, Zo had to admit he felt somewhat better. He lay on his bed and Leo sat on Riario's bed and they watched TV for a while, making sarcastic comments about the people trying to buy houses with a mile long list of details they wanted but for a tiny price.

Zo had to throw up again halfway through the show but a second glass of water stayed down.

Riario came home a little before lunchtime with a carrier bag of supplies. Painkillers and anti-nausea medication, ginger tea, crackers, tissues, toilet paper, fresh fruit, and a couple of music magazines.

"Thanks," Zo said, stunned.

Riario shrugged. "I can skip my economics and statistics class this afternoon," he said. "You may go, Leonardo."

Leo looked to Zo, who nodded.

"I probably ought to attend at least one class today," Leo agreed and left.

Riario made tea. Zo took some of the drugs and then sipped at the ginger tea. Riario read a textbook while Zo skimmed the magazines. It was surprisingly companionable.

Zo managed some crackers and later a mug of coffee - caffeine was good for nausea he told Riario when he made to protest. Riario disappeared off to the communal kitchen and came back with toast which Zo devoured, his appetite returning. Riario put on some rubber gloves and scrubbed the bathroom which probably made it the cleanest it had been since Zo moved in.

"You didn't have to do that," Zo said.

"Kill the germs you'd left all over the facilities?"

"Stay with me this afternoon. Bring me things."

Riario gave him a long look. "I'm your partner. For the study. But I'm also your roommate."

Zo nodded. "Yes. I guess I'm just not used to having people around. Other than Leo. And Leo's..."

"Unpredictable? Unreliable?"

Zo nodded. "He tries."

"Yes." Riario checked his watch. "I need to go to the library and do some work. You'll be all right for a while?"

"I'm fine," Zo promised. "Go. Leo will bring me something inappropriate to eat later I'm sure."

Riario gave a small smile at that and gathered up his things. "I'm glad you're feeling better," he said and headed out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [The Missing Stair](http://geekfeminism.wikia.com/wiki/Missing_stair)


	2. Chapter 2

"Split up?" Zo asked, and his grip tightened on Riario's hand. "What for?"

"We need to talk to you individually," the researcher said. "It's part of the protocols. We need to make sure your answers are unbiased."

"It sounds like an interrogation," Zo fumed. "Split us up, take us into separate rooms, ask us all sorts of invasive questions!"

"Darling," Riario said, squeezing at Zo's hand. "It's all right."

Zo met his gaze. If he made too much of a fuss they'd probably be kicked off the study. He forced himself to relax, letting go of Riario's hand. "You're right. I overreact sometimes."

Riario nodded. "We'll get coffee afterwards."

Zo let the male researcher take him to his office while Riario was led away by the female researcher.

 

"Question one," the researcher said, consulting the list. " _Do you think the study is having an impact on your relationship?_ "

Zo nodded. "I guess so. We talk more."

 

_"Do you think the study is having an impact on your relationship?"_

Riario smiled. "Definitely. A good one."

"Can you elaborate?"

"We communicate more openly. We're learning things about each other."

 

_"Do you think your relationship has changed since the start of the study and the exercises?"_

"Yes," Zo said. "I mean, we moved in together. That's been a change. A good one."

"You moved in together because of the study?"

Zo hesitated. "My roommate had just got kicked out, so it was good timing," he said. "And Ri- Girolamo wasn't getting on great with his roomie, so it seemed like the logical thing to do."

"Did you have concerns about how it might negatively impact your relationship?"

Zo shook his head. "If anything, I thought it would make us closer."

"And has it?"

"Yes." Zo stroked his chin. "Last week I was sick, and he took care of me. I'm still not used to that. To have someone look out for me that way is, well, it was nice. Not great because I was too busy throwing up to enjoy it. But I didn't know that I could rely on him that much."

 

_"Do you think your relationship has changed since the start of the study and the exercises?"_

"Absolutely, I think it's making us discuss the relationship," Riario said, taking delight in being able to be truthful. "I feel I didn't really know him before this."

*

Riario considered the page in front of him, an exercise they were to do before the next meeting. "Demonstrating commitment," he said and, at Zo's confused look, "It's one of the topics."

"Yeah, sure," Zo agreed. He ought to pay more attention to the study materials but if Riario was doing so, well, that was what partnership was for wasn't it, sharing responsibilities.

"The exercise suggested says we have to think of two things we have done for each other and write about them, and then think of something we can do in the future."

Zo considered for a moment. "Moving in together," he suggested.

That was one item and Riario made some notes about it.

"Are there examples?" Zo asked.

Negotiating compromises, physical gestures of affection, opening up emotionally, gift giving, making long term plans, being honest, being supportive - there were no concrete examples just these vague suggestions. They discussed it for a while.

"Long term plans," Zo said. "That can be for the future. We could plan to go away somewhere on a romantic weekend in the summer."

Zo wrote that section up, laughing when the spellchecker tried to make Girolamo Riario into Glamorous Rosario. "Sounds like I'm dating a porn star," he chuckled. Riario rolled his eyes.

For the second way they had already demonstrated commitment, Zo suggested negotiating compromises. "We have our own friends so I spend time with Leo but I make time for you and you sometimes come along with us, and, er, I don't come in past midnight unless I call you."

Riario lowered his gaze. "That is acceptable. You should write that one."

Zo did but he kept glancing at Riario. Who did Riario spend time with? Nico if they were working on a class project, but not Awful Alfie as expected, and rarely Lucrezia.

"You should come out with us," Zo said. "Tonight it'll be quiet, no club, just some drinks with Leo, Nico, Vanessa and maybe Giuliano."

Riario shook his head. "Maybe another time."

"All right. But we need to be seen in public sometimes," Zo said. "It's my birthday next week. We'll probably go out for a nice meal. You'll have to come to the restaurant."

"Of course." Riario got to his feet. "I'll be at the library until late tonight."

Zo sighed. It wasn't going to demonstrate commitment if Riario wouldn't let himself be seen with his supposed boyfriend.

When Riario had gone, Zo filled in another form, one that asked what qualities Zo looked for in a romantic partner.

\- Sense of humour.  
\- Fun to be with. Preferably an optimist.  
\- Attractive.   
Zo hesitated, realised he wanted to be honest and while he didn't delete that, amended it to "I find them attractive" which was subjective and less potentially offensive.  
\- Loyal.   
Though Leo could be an ass and sometimes let him down...which led to him adding:  
\- Reliable.   
If Leo were more reliable they'd have made a better couple.  
\- Shares chores equally.  
Definitely not Leo. Nico spent a lot of time complaining about how messy his roommate was.  
\- Honesty.   
Zo chewed at his lip and added, "I can be honest with them and they are honest with me. No big lies."

Zo sat back in his chair. He felt there were many more things that ought to be on the list but he wasn't sure what they were. He couldn't write "not having disagreements" because he did love Leo despite their fights and everyone had arguments sometimes. But being able to talk them through instead of it blowing up out of proportion and descending into vicious name calling or violence, that was important.

He couldn't think of a short way to say that. Riario probably could. Leo would add more flowery words to it. He added:

\- Intelligence.  
\- Creativity.  
\- Compassionate.  
With inspiration he wrote:  
\- Mature response to disagreements.  
Zo was proud of that summation of his rambling thoughts.  
\- Thoughtful.  
Zo paused again. That was different to intelligent in a way? Leaned towards being creative. Could also suggest compassion. What did he mean there? In the end he left it as it was, vague and open to interpretation.  
\- Needs me.  
Zo swallowed and got up, paced the room. That was painfully true. He wanted to be needed, to feel useful. He deleted it and replaced it with "Trusts Me". A little close to the honesty item he'd put earlier but still. There were some things he wasn't ready to share with the researchers.  
-Someone who is my friend.  
That was a safe option. Relationships built on lust didn't last.

This was the most thought he'd ever put into what he looked for in a partner. Zo tended to just meet people and decide if he liked them or not. He decided that was enough for now and treated himself to a hot shower and a cold beer for his efforts.

*

It wasn't Nico as he expected, but Vanessa who opened the door, clad in shorts and a scruffy t-shirt, copper coloured hair loose about her face. "Hey, Riario." She cocked her head, gesturing for him to come in. "I guess now you're sort of Zo's boyfriend rather than Nico's occasional study partner we should learn how to pronounce Girolamo."

"You've got it down perfectly," he told her and she beamed.

"Will Gio do? Girolamo is such a lot of syllables," Leo chimed in, running one hand over his duvet. He was in sitting up in bed, shirtless, scruffy, and somehow looking like he could be a poster on a student's wall, rather than a student himself. "Is there any milk left, Vanessa?"

"I'm making coffee," Vanessa told Riario, adding to Leo, "I think there's some coffee creamer."

Leo pulled a face. "I bet Riario takes it black anyway, like all his clothes."

"Leo!"

"Black is fine," Riario agreed. As insults went it was mild and not exactly untruthful. He did wear a lot of black. He hadn't intended to partake in coffee but he didn't want to refuse and seem rude. Trying to ignore Leo's state of casual undress, Riario took the computer chair by the battered desk.

"What are you doing here?" Leo asked, stretching and stifling a yawn.

Riario watched Vanessa making the drinks. "I came to talk to you. I didn't know you'd have company."

"Vanessa's not company."

"I shall pour this coffee over your ungrateful crotch," she threatened from the corner designated as a kitchen space.

Leo smirked. "You love me really."

"He had a bad night that's why he's extra annoying," Vanessa told Riario. "And why I'm here."

"I get nightmares," Leo agreed without a hint of shame or embarrassment. "If someone stays with me, I can sometimes get back to sleep."

Riario considered. "Possibly smoking so much weed is a cause?"

Leo scoffed. "Actually I sleep better after a hit."

Vanessa handed out mugs of what appeared to be coffee. Riario stamped down his snobbery and sipped at it politely.

There was a knock at the door. Vanessa squeezed past Riario and opened the door. Giuliano stepped inside.

"It's getting crowded," Leo observed.

"I'll be two minutes," Vanessa promised. She gulped down her coffee, put aside the mug, picked up a bundle of clothes and disappeared into the bathroom.

"Where's Nico?" Giuliano asked, though he kept eyeing Riario as if the question he wanted to ask was more about Riario's presence than Nico's absence.

"Overnight study group."

Giuliano smirked and Leo laughed in agreement.

Vanessa breezed out of the bathroom, wearing boots and a long dress. She'd pinned up her hair, and applied a minimum of make-up. Riario checked his watch.

"She's very low maintenance," Leo said, seeing the gesture. "If she says two minutes, she means two or three. If I say two, I mean two going on twenty."

"See you later, Leo." Vanessa ruffled his hair on the way past, grabbing her bag and heading for the door, which Giuliano had already opened. "Bye, Girolamo." She kissed Giuliano on the cheek.

"Later," Giuliano said and they were gone. The room was quiet. Leo sighed and snuggled back against his pillows.

"Isn't he jealous?" Riario asked.

"She wouldn't keep dating him if he was. Can't stand people being possessive," Leo said. "We're not screwing, not any more. He has to trust her. Isn't that one of the things in the relationship study?"

"Yes." Riario set down the coffee mug. "It's rather more Demonstrating Affection that I'm concerned with."

Leo gave a wicked smile and Riario glared at him.

"Not like that. I found out it is Zo's birthday in less than a week. I have no idea what to buy him."

Leo sat up and slid out of bed. To Riario's relief, he was wearing boxers. "You have to buy him a gift?"

"Isn't that what boyfriends do?" Riario returned. Even pretend ones.

"Shouldn't boyfriends know what to buy?" Leo asked.

"This was a bad idea," Riario said, tired of the game.

"No, wait," Leo said, as Riario got to his feet. "You came to me because I'm Zo's friend. That's considerate."

"Creative problem solving," Riario said with a hint of pride. "And er, that thing about interconnected relationships." At Leo's puzzled look, he shrugged. "I cannot recall it exactly but I got the impression it included how you get on with each other's friends and families."

Leo nodded, picked up a shirt, sniffed it, tossed it aside. "Well I have a few ideas," he said. "If you buy me breakfast, I'll take you shopping." He picked up another shirt, which was deemed acceptable, and put it on.

"It's a deal," Riario said.

*

After a huge breakfast and extra coffee, Leo took Riario into various shops talking about Zo's interest in music, chess, and antiques.

Riario found the perfect gift in an antique store; a small chess board with hand-carved pieces. He negotiated the price down to what he could afford and he and Leo left feeling satisfied.

"I saw you looking at the cameras and lenses in the store," Leo said. "I've never really got into photography - I prefer painting and sculpture. But I appreciate the art form."

Riario shrugged. "I've dabbled," he said and somehow over lunch he found himself telling Leo about his interest in photography, something his father derided but which gave Riario pleasure. The way a photograph could capture a moment enthralled him, the interplay of light and shadow - chiaroscuro, Leo enthused, it being an art term and something important in black and white photography - the way a slight change in angle could change the tone...

"I need to make some sketches," Leo said as they walked back to the campus. "Bring your camera and we'll compare notes."

"I don't know," Riario said.

"You're supposed to be at least pretending to be friends with me," Leo reminded him. Riario found himself agreeing.

Riario stashed the gift in his bottom drawer and took out his digital SLR camera. Just because his father wouldn't allow him to study photography, didn't mean Riario couldn't have a hobby. In the days before he'd sold his car when he'd had money to spare, he'd purchased an expensive model and a couple of books to help him learn the right techniques.

Zo had been out for a long run and returned to the room as Riario was checking the batteries and SD card. When he asked where Riario was going, and Riario explained, Zo said he would come too and stripped off his t-shirt. Riario let his gaze wander a moment before he returned his attention to the camera.

It took Zo only a couple of minutes to freshen up and pull on a clean shirt. The three men were soon headed out of the campus and into the nearby park.

Leo sketched for a while and Riario took a few photographs. Zo pointed out things he thought were interesting and Riario took some close up details of tree trunks and a rusted bench.

When Leo got bored he wandered over and asked to see the photos. He skimmed through them, giving praise that brought a faint blush to Riario's cheek, along with some concrit.

"You ought to take a class," Leo said. "If this is what you can do with minimal training I'd love to see what you come up with after a few weeks and in a professional setting."

Zo added his own words of encouragement. "If your father thinks you're not only fake-dating a man but developing a trade he'll have to step in," he said. "And if he doesn't then at least you'll be doing something you enjoy."

"I'll consider it," Riario said, probably to shut them up.

They headed into the town and ordered drinks. Riario took some more shots, Zo and Leo obligingly posing in increasingly ridiculous ways.

That evening, Riario looked through the photos, wistful.

"I thought they were good," Zo said, climbing into bed. "Why do you look so sad?"

"Photographs are lies," Riario said. "People smile when they don't mean it."

"But sometimes they do mean it," Zo said. He had a feeling they weren't talking solely about photographs.

Riario put the camera aside and went to use the bathroom. When he returned and got into his own bed, Zo said, "I had fun today."

"As did I," Riario allowed and turned off the light.

Zo lay awake for a while. Riario wasn't the uptight prick he'd thought but Riario was still a mystery in many ways and guarded in a way that Zo was not used to.

Leo was open and expressive and Riario was the opposite. Yet somehow Zo kept finding things - their artistic nature, their expressive eyes - that proved they were similar.

*

Riario had made a coffee for Zo and then he sat at the desk, working, while Zo sipped at the drink before using the bathroom.

"Happy birthday," Riario said as soon as Zo was dressed, and handed over an envelope and a nicely wrapped package.

Zo blinked, surprised. "Thank you."

The envelope contained a card. There was a cat wearing a party hat on it and the text beneath it read "Happy Birthday Boyfriend". Riario was committed to putting on a show.

The blue and white striped paper gave way to Zo's fumbling fingers. Zo stared at the tiny chess set for a moment.

"Leonardo said you would like it," Riario told him, his tone suggesting that if Zo did not like it then he should blame Leo.

"I love it. You didn't have to buy me anything."

"I'm your boyfriend."

Lying his ass off to some psychology students had been something Zo was prepared to do. Having Riario move in had been a necessary evil that had not been terrible as he'd expected. This fake relationship was however becoming much more complicated than anticipated.

"Right," Zo said at last. "Thank you."

Riario nodded, swiped at his hair. The front was getting longer than he usually wore it. "I would take you to breakfast but I have an early corporate finance class."

"Sure," Zo agreed. "We're all going out to dinner tonight anyway."

Leo had sent a "Happy B'day" (plus a dozen seemingly random emojis) message just after midnight. Not long after Riario left for class, Leo showed up in person to deliver a gift.

It was a painting of Zo as a male model on the catwalk, though Zo couldn't keep it yet because it was part of Leo's portfolio. It was the thought that counted, Zo said, and at least Leo had finished a piece of art. Leo also handed over a card from Nico, which had a gift card for Zo's favourite clothes store tucked inside.

At lunchtime Vanessa sought Zo out to give him a kiss, a card signed by her and Giuliano, and an expensive bottle of whisky. Riario would enjoy that gift as much he did - Zo shook himself at the unexpected thought.

Zo didn't pay much attention to that afternoon's French film studies class. He wished it was intermediate Italian so Riario would be in class with him, because they hadn't had chance to talk about that gift and wouldn't get much opportunity this evening. It was thoughtful and appreciated. That Leo had suggested it didn't detract from the fact that Riario had asked Leo for advice. That could not have been easy, because the two men were both smug assholes sometimes and Riario did not like asking for help.

That evening Zo emerged from the bathroom in his three piece suit and Riario nodded approvingly. He was dressed in a black suit too, linen shirt crisp, thin black tie clipped to the shirt with a silver tie pin. Zo possessed one tie which he was not wearing and did not know anyone else who owned a tie pin.

Riario cleared his throat. "Your friends all know the relationship is a lie. But if you wish to hold hands in public that will be acceptable."

Zo was used to gregarious friends who held hands and hugged and kissed without such dour proclamations. But for Riario, this was progress so Zo smiled and said, "I'd like that."

The more they held hands the more used to it Riario would become. Maybe a couple of glasses of wine would loosen Riario up further.

Dinner was not awkward, as might have been the case. Nico, wearing an actual tuxedo, asked Riario about something discussed in their corporate law class, which broke the ice. Vanessa, resplendent in a blue gown, hair elegantly arranged, approved of the tie pin while Giuliano, smartly dressed and well groomed, made a few jokes to ensure there was no tension. Leo was, well, Leo. His midnight blue suit was paired with a white t-shirt rather than a formal shirt and his hair was tied back. He could be a one-man party if he needed to and added banter whenever conversation seemed it might flag. Riario soon relaxed and the meal was pleasant.

Giuliano slipped one arm around Vanessa while they waited for dessert and Riario reached over to take Zo's hand. It no longer felt weird to Zo. He squeezed Riario's fingers a little and smiled at him. Riario lowered his gaze as if shy.

Back at the room, Zo opened up his birthday whisky and filled two shot glasses. He and Riario toasted "To surviving another year" and drank.

"I've had a great day," Zo said honestly, putting down the glass. "And I'm still taken aback by the gift."

Riario shrugged. "Don't be."

Zo slid one arm around Riario's shoulders, noting how Riario's posture stiffened at the contact before he relaxed once he accepted Zo was not a threat. "You're the best fake boyfriend I could have wished for," Zo said before he released Riario.

Riario gave a small smile and excused himself to use the bathroom, pausing only to shed his jacket and tie.

Zo waited his turn, sitting at the desk and drinking another shot. If someone had told him a few weeks ago that he'd invite Riario to his birthday dinner he'd have laughed at them. That he'd not only insisted on Riario attending, but had actually enjoyed having him there, was still something Zo was amazed at.

When Riario climbed into bed, Zo said, "This is progress we can be honest about for the study. That we're closer now. In truth we were acquaintances. And now we're friends."

Riario looked over at him. "Are we?"

How could he doubt it? "Yes."

Riario considered this for a moment. "I've only ever had people like Alfonso in my life," he said. "They want to be friends because of what it offers them. I have acquaintances, like Clarice, and hangers-on, but not really friends. Not the way you mean it."

Zo shook his head. "That's fucked up. But forget Alfie. You have me and Leo and the others now. And that's not just because of the study. We like you more now that we realise you're not always uptight. I mean sure, you're the only one of us who cares about choosing the wine beyond what colour it is, and your taste in music is a little conservative, but you're a lot more fun than we thought. I mean it. I had a great day and I'm glad you were there."

Riario gave a small smile and then turned off the lamp on his side of the room.

Zo headed off to the bathroom, still pondering Riario's reaction to the declaration of friendship. If Riario wasn't used to having friends maybe he wasn't accustomed to compliments either. How fucked up was that?

*

Lorenzo clasped Clarice's face between his palms and kissed her possessively. "See you later," he said. "Work on the assignment, won't you?"

Clarice nodded, clutching her books with a wry expression as he walked away. "Girolamo," she called. "Would you like to brainstorm ideas with me for the essay? Lorenzo is no use."

Riario agreed and he and Clarice found themselves a table in the corner of the canteen. They talked about the essay for a while. Clarice decided on Arguments For and Against Outsourcing, while Riario chose Social Media Pros and Cons.

Clarice sat back in her seat, coffee cup in hand. "So, I hear you're participating in that relationship study the psych department is running."

Riario nodded warily. He tried to look calm as he tidied away his papers. "You hear correctly."

"I had no idea you were seeing...what is his name, exactly? Everyone calls him Zo. I assumed it was short for Zooey."

Riario shrugged. "He signs his paperwork as Zoroaster de Peretola," he said. "I assume Zoroaster is a family name, as Girloamo is."

"He signs his paperwork," Clarice repeated drily. "That sounds intimate."

Riario realised his mistake and stared at her, wondering how to fix it. She held his gaze.

"I'm hardly going to report you for deceiving the psych department," she said. "Clearly this is some scheme of yours. Either you need the money or you're looking to piss off your father. Possibly both?"

He gave a curt nod.

"What happened?"

"I would rather not discuss it."

Clarice nodded, took a sip of her drink. "Have you heard from your father since claiming to be dating such an inappropriate suitor?"

"No." There'd been no contact, and if his father was having him watched then Riario's actions weren't yet enough to warrant intervention. In truth he'd expected an outraged call from his father by now. Perhaps the old man was just making him sweat, playing chicken to see who blinked first.

"Well..." Clarice finished her coffee. "I hope things work out for you. Relationships can be tricky."

She'd know. Her family had practically betrothed her to Lorenzo at birth and while to be his girlfriend and future wife held many an opportunity, and Clarice tried her best to manipulate Lorenzo and make the most of the advantages his presence gave her, it was common knowledge that Lorenzo was unfaithful and disrespectful.

Riario had wondered why she hadn't dumped Lorenzo. Agreeing to fake a relationship because he needed the cash had given him new insight, yet the genuine companionship he hadn't expected was again making him wonder if Clarice shouldn't risk her family's wrath and find someone she genuinely loved.


	3. Chapter 3

"Here," Zo said. He thumped the vending machine which finally deposited the can of soda.

Dani grinned. "Thanks."

Zo and Riario had just picked up some paperwork for the relationship study and had headed to the canteen to fill it in. Dani was there, waiting for Sylvia; they had an interview session scheduled and would walk to the psych department's building together.

"They'll probably separate you again," Zo warned as all three moved to a table and Zo slid into the far seat. Riario put down the tray he was carrying with two large cappuccinos on it.

Dani nodded. "I feel safer when Sylvia is there," she admitted. "It makes it easier to talk about my relationship. But we're on the same page with things so it's not a problem."

Lorenzo was leaning on a nearby chair. "God, that stupid study! Clarice wanted to do it, hoping for extra credit or something. I told her, no way. Why are you losers interested in it? Letting your boyfriend drag you further into the gutter, Riario?"

Riario twitched at the intonation on boyfriend as did Zo. It was mockery whichever way it was meant to be interpreted.

"And how are you in the study?" Lorenzo went on, addressing Dani. "Asexual? Like a goddamn plant?" He scoffed. "As if anyone would want you anyway."

Dani stared at the table.

"I am sure she would not want an ignorant athlete for a boyfriend if she were heterosexual," Riario said coldly. "I'm not sure what Clarice sees in you beyond your ability to run up and down a field or to handle balls."

He emphasised balls, clearly hoping to needle Lorenzo who liked to brag about his female only conquests. He succeeded.

Lorenzo stood, drawing himself up to his full, impressive, height. "Stay out of what does not concern you," he warned.

"Likewise," Riario said, holding his ground.

Lorenzo scoffed again as if Riario was not worth his time and left the canteen.

Zo reached out to touch Dani's arm. "Hey. He's an asshole. You know that."

She nodded.

"Sex isn't what makes a relationship," Zo said. "Caring about your partner, supporting them, sharing your life with them. Those things are important."

"Demonstrating commitment," Dani said tearfully, trying to sound light hearted. "Creative problem solving."

Zo laughed. "Yeah. What's that one about interconnectedness?"

Sylvia arrived then and was quickly apprised of the situation. Furious she paced for a moment before she took a seat next to Dani and pulled her close. Riario and Zo watched as Sylvia murmured words of comfort and kissed Dani's hair.

"We should go," Riario offered, ready to pick up the tray, moved by the display of affection.

"No. We have to leave shortly," Sylvia said, glancing at her watch. "Unless you need to skip it, sweetheart?"

Dani shook her head. "I want to go."

The two women left, hand in hand. Riario took Dani's vacated seat, opposite Zo.

"Fucking Lorenzo," Zo said in disgust.

Riario nodded. He sipped at his cappuccino, licked at his lips.

"Did you mean that?"

"What? Lorenzo? Yeah. Fuck him. Asshole."

Riario shook his head. "About sex."

Zo studied him. "Yes. Doesn't have to be a sexual relationship or even a romantic one to be important. Friendships can be deeply meaningful. Romantic relationships are meaningful. Any relationships with sex in it can be meaningful so long as that's not all there this to it. It's not a competition."

Riario took another sip of his drink.

"You disagree?" Zo asked.

"It's not something I've thought much about," Riario said.

They finished their drinks in a somewhat awkward silence. Riario skimmed the new exercise they'd been given, chewing at his lip. Zo had stashed his paperwork in his back pocket and didn't feel like taking it out to read, more concerned about Riario's reaction to it than to whatever the exercise entailed.

When they got back to the room, Riario pulled out his hip flask and took a few long pulls from it.

"Sit," he ordered and Zo did so.

Zo watched Riario pace and take another few drinks. He would have liked one himself but somehow staying perfectly still and quiet seemed like the best plan. Clearly the run-in with Lorenzo had disturbed Riario and maybe he just needed to get that anger out of his system.

"The next exercise," Riario said bluntly. "You pre-empted it when you told me about your sexual past."

Oh.

"You don't have to talk about it. You can make something up," Zo said.

Riario shook his head. He let out a deep sigh, paced the room one more, pausing at the door.

"On my eighteenth birthday my father gave me two things," Riario said, and Zo heard the inflection in his voice change, the strained bitterness beneath the words, the forced smile colouring every syllable. "A sports car, and an afternoon with a prostitute."

Zo blinked a few times. "I got a gift voucher," he said, and he'd considered that better than the nothing which he had been expecting. He winced. "Sorry. Go on."

Riario gestured, that lazy, dismissive wave of one hand he was fond of. It always caught Zo's attention, as if he were a cat tracking a laser. "What more is there to say? I was expected to fuck her and so I did."

Zo stared at him. "But you didn't enjoy it?"

Riario shook his head, refusing to meet Zo's gaze. "It was the most horrendous experience of my life. But I couldn't tell anyone that. Because that's what men do, they fuck women, and they enjoy it."

"That is fucked up," Zo said. "Bad choice of words. Sorry." He'd never apologised to anyone this much, ever.

Riario nodded.

"But what about Zita?" Zo asked, brow creased in concentration. "I thought you and her were a thing for a while."

"I didn't know you paid me that much attention." Riario glanced over but Zo refused to take the bait and allow Riario distract him. Eventually Riario said, "We were. But she made the first move. She kept trying to win me over. She said she loved me; maybe it was true. I cared for Zita, I truly did. But I didn't love her the way she wanted; the way she deserved."

Riario swallowed hard, rubbed at the back of his neck. Oh dear God, Zo was in so far over his head with this. Leo would know what to say, Vanessa would know what to do, but he was alone with Riario and it was up to him to deal with this.

"Girolamo," he said softly, but what else was there to say?

"I fucked her, is that what you want to hear?" Riario's eyes flashed with anger, but Zo saw the unshed tears fighting for dominance against the rage. "Yes, yes, I did, she wanted me to. And I tried, for her, I didn't hold back, I did what I was supposed to do. She was happy. It wasn't terrible this time. But it was still..."

"Still?"

The rage had gone. Riario took a few shaky breaths, ran one hand over his hair. "Unsatisfying."

"Right." Zo took a breath, steeled himself. "And what about Doctor Goth?"

Laura Cereta, aka Doctor Goth, was a post-graduate student working on a doctorate in political science and who wore almost as much black as Riario did. She was formidable and some of the students were scared of her, not least because she had a collection of skulls in her room. However anyone who brought her a drink and who was not a sexist pig found her surprisingly warm and with a cruder sense of humour than might be imagined. She'd fully embraced her nickname.

"God," Riario moaned. "She was relentless. She kept flirting with me. I was just trying to be polite."

"I think it went a bit further than that," Zo said as diplomatically as he could manage. "I saw you carrying her textbooks a couple of times and you were giving her the eye."

"Maybe I flirted back," Riario allowed. "But that's what you do, isn't it? A woman like that wants to date you, you don't argue. One day she cornered me in the corridor, and I swear, she kissed me first."

"First? Did you kiss her back?"

Riario nodded. "But then she wanted to take me to her room and I said no. I didn't want to have sex with her."

"And?"

He gave a sad smile. "She was nice about it. Said if I changed my mind, I knew where to find her."

Zo let out a long sigh. He was rapidly reassessing everything he knew about Riario.

"So your entire life you've had one relationship and sex like, twice, with two women?" Zo hadn't meant to sound sceptical but it was too late to do anything about it now.

Riario shrugged. "You don't believe me?"

"No, I do. I just..." He'd assumed Riario had bedded a number of women which just proved Riario's point, didn't it, that men fucked women and the more successful/handsome/rich the guy, the more women he'd fucked. "I suppose you mast– no, let's not go there, not tonight."

This was a weird enough conversation as it was.

Zo took a deep breath. "So you're not interested in women."

Another shrug. "I can't be anything but straight," Riario said in a strangled voice. "My father would kill me."

"Who cares what he thinks? You're old enough to make your own decisions!" Zo took a few steps closer to Riario. "Tell you what, he lays a finger on you, I'll punch him out."

That drew a short laugh from Riario. "You don't appreciate his reach. He could cut me off, leave me penniless, ruin my reputation with potential employers."

"Fuck any employer who wouldn't want a gay employee!" Zo was fuming now. "And hasn't he cut you off already? Isn't that why we signed up for this project, because you needed the money?"

He placed one hand on Riario's shoulder. Riario eyed the offending hand but made no move to shrug it away.

"Things are complicated," Riario said, and no shit, apparently this man's entire life was complicated. "To be honest, I thought he would have confronted me by now. I planned to tell him I was only pretending to be gay because I so badly needed the money and he'd have to restore my bank balance."

"It's not true though, is it?" Zo squeezed gently at Riario's shoulder.

"I don't know." Riario gave a half-laugh, half-sob. "I don't know what I am."

This Zo could handle. That "Sexuality, Sex, Gender, and Identity" class Vanessa had dragged him to a few times was about to come in handy.

"It's all right," Zo said. "You don't have to know. Seems like every day there's a new word for a sexual attraction or romantic feeling, now we're finally realising that sexuality and attraction and gender are not as clear cut as people once believed. People are trying to figure themselves out all the time. You don't have to be anything yet. You can just be you, and so far you know you haven't enjoyed sex with women, so let's cross outright heterosexual off the list, eh? Not to say you can't be demisexual, mind. Biromantic. Greyasexual. There's lots of options."

"I'm supposed to be straight," Riario said and it was almost like a plea for help.

"You can't just decide that," Zo said. "Just like I can't stop finding both men and women hot."

"That's because you're a slut," Riario said automatically and Zo laughed. Riario laughed too, and Zo let him go.

"Good to know at least part of you is still a prick," Zo teased.

Riario smiled and then became serious again. "The study is making me think more about things." 

Zo stared at Riario. "Do you want to stop the experiment? We can tell the researcher that it put so much strain on our relationship that we've broken up. They have to pay us for the work we've done so far, right?"

"You read the small print?" Riario sounded surprised. "Yes. We'll get a partial payment."

"Then we'll stop," Zo said.

Riario shook his head. "No. Perhaps – perhaps it might help. All these questions have brought me this far. Maybe they can help me figure things out."

"Maybe," Zo agreed cautiously. "But if you want out, tell me and we'll quit."

"Thank you."

Zo nodded. "That was a lot you shared with me. Thank you for trusting me. I know it was difficult. Are you all right?"

Riario gave a weak smile. "I suppose so."

Zo sighed. "Come here," he said, and held out his arms, because that's what he would do with Leo after they'd talked through a problem. He was thrilled when Riario stepped forward, let Zo wrap his arms around him and hold him close, one hand rubbing gently at Riario's back.

When he let go, Riario said, "I'm going to the library."

"All right."

"Not to study." Riario swallowed. "I have a part time job. I work downstairs in the archives. If I stacked shelves people might see me but I was lucky enough to get a position helping with the digitisation project. Scanning old books."

Well, shit. That was where Riario kept disappearing off to.

"That sounds like an interesting job," Zo said.

"It is somewhat repetitive but it pays well," Riario said. "There might be another position coming up soon, if you're interested."

Zo nodded. "Thank you. I'll think about it."

One snide remark from Lorenzo and a few swigs of whisky and all of sudden Riario was confessing his most treasured secrets to Zo like he was a priest and not Riario's roommate.

Zo studied for a while and then sent Leo a message.

"Riario stood up to Lorenzo today."

"I heard. Sylvia told Vanessa and she told me and Nico."

"We had a Talk afterwards."

"?"

Zo considered if had the right to out Riario but he needed someone to talk to and Leo was supposedly part of the package. Also Leo liked to banter and Zo wanted to make sure banter about sexuality was off the table given what he'd just learnt. "I guess Riario isn't straight."

"LOL. He's your boyfriend."

"Pretend boyfriend." Zo stared at that for a while and then added, "He's questioning, for real though. And upset because his father's a homophobic asshole."

"Sucks," Leo agreed. "Are you sure we didn't just corrupt him with our hedonism and bisexual badassery?"

Zo laughed. "Sexuality isn't catching you prick. But we need to be careful with him."

"What do you mean?"

"He's fragile." Not so long back Zo would have doubted Riario even had feelings and now he was being protective of them.

Leo concurred, asking, "Riario? Isn't he all stone and stealing?" followed by "*steely".

"Only on the outside. He's not like us, Leo. He has an image to maintain. Years of repressing his feelings. He can't be pushed or mocked or we might break him."

"All right. No teasing about sex." A few emojis followed, a smiley face, fingers held up in salute, sunshine for some reason, and a pride flag.

Zo returned to studying. When Riario came home he asked for help with the Italian translation he'd been struggling with and Riario deftly made a few corrections.

"Thanks," Zo said. "You're a star."

Riario gave him a genuine smile.

Before he fell asleep that night, Zo found himself thinking about the list of qualities he looked for in a partner. He was beginning to realise that many of the non-Leo things he liked applied to Riario. His roommate, his true friend, and, to Zo's utter amazement, someone he could actually imagine having as a boyfriend.

*

"What are your plans for today?" Zo was lazing in bed as Riario pulled on a t-shirt. Riario had become more relaxed about partial nudity and Zo got to appreciate bare-chested Riario most days.

"Make some amendments to the business admin essay. Get a hair cut."

Zo sat up. "Don't do that."

"I found another paper I want to include."

"Not the essay." Zo gestured. "The hair. I like it."

Riario gave him a long look as if assessing whether this was teasing. He fingered the long locks which sat over his forehead. "Honestly?"

"Honestly."

"You're trying to turn me into Leo."

The tone was light-hearted even if the sentiment might be something Riario wondered about. Zo smiled. "You've got a long way to go before that. Leo walks into a room and it's immediately more untidy. You walk into a room and it's immediately classier. I just like the hair, is all. It suits you."

Riario sat down on Zo's bed. "I won't get it cut then."

Zo lifted one hand and caressed Riario's hair. "You and Leo are different," he said. "But you're also similar. And I think you're both very attractive."

He expected Riario to freeze up. Instead Riario gave a smile. Emboldened, Zo cupped Riario's chin with his thumb, fingers caressing Riario's cheek.

"Girolamo." Zo was asking permission and Riario understood for he gave a sharp nod and leaned in.

Zo kissed him, soft and tender. This was the first time Riario had kissed a man, one of the few times he'd been kissed at all, and Zo wanted it to be pleasant.

He paused afterwards to let Riario decide on his next move.

Riario didn't kiss him again but he did place his hand - artistic hand, Leo was right - over Zo's. "What would you like to do today?"

"I was going to go for a walk," Zo said. "Get some exercise. Appreciate the nature on our doorstep. Then grab lunch and do a bit of shopping. You could come with me. Bring the camera."

Riario nodded. "I'd like that."

They headed out into the park and holding hands seemed natural now, not an affectation. They stopped by the river to watch a family feeding the ducks and geese and Riario took a few shots of a particularly bold goose that came to see if he had brought something to eat. Zo obligingly posed on a tree stump for some photos, Riario playing with the camera settings to get some different results.

Riario purchased ice cream from the tiny café at the far end of the park and they sat on a bench eating and chatting.

"This is nice," Zo said, tossing the end of his cone onto the grass for the wildlife to enjoy. He had half a mind to give up on the shopping and grab a sandwich from the café for lunch, spend the rest of the day lazing around with Riario.

"Something we can talk about at the next interview," Riario agreed.

Right. The study. Zo wondered what would happen when the study was over, or worse, if Riario's father demanded he stop seeing Zo in order to have his cashflow restored. It was a subduing thought.

"I'd like to take some photos of the statue in town," Riario said. "If that's all right?"

"Sure. Whatever you want." Zo forced a smile.

Riario wiped his hand off on his jeans and took Zo's hand, squeezing it between both of his. He hesitated only a moment before he leaned in to bestow a quick kiss on Zo's cheek.

Progress. Public display of affectation without any prompting. Riario wanted to demonstrate affection and was doing so…and still Zo wondered if it was going to be enough. If Riario could move past his insecurities and upbringing and let himself love and be loved.

*

"Question one," the researcher began. " _Has your level of sexual intimacy changed since the start of the study?_ "

"It's the same," Zo said. And yes, he was happy with it, and they were always careful to discuss and make compromises where necessary.

 

" _Has the level of sexual intimacy changed since the start of the study?_ "

"No," Riario said. "Yes." He was torn; kisses weren't sexual but they were more physical intimacy than he'd previously enjoyed with Zo.

"Can you elaborate?"

"I believe our physical intimacy is more frequent," Riario said, choosing the truth. And yes he was happy with that. Zo made him feel safe. Zo listened to him. Zo cared about what Riario wanted.

The researcher's pen halted as she made notes on Riario's praise of Zo. She gave Riario a look of concern. "Are you all right?"

Riario nodded, swallowed hard, blinked away unexpected tears. "This relationship is different to what I've had before," he said.

"In a good way?"

"In a good way," he agreed. He shook his head. "I apologise."

"Don't. It's not good to suppress your feelings."

Riario forced a smile. "Zo would say the same thing. He wants me to be open and honest. I love him for that alone."

*

Zo was waiting outside, sitting on a low wall. He got to his feet when Riario joined him, surprised when Riario initiated a hug.

"Hey. Was it terrible? What did they ask you? Girolamo?" Zo took a step back, wanting to see Riario's face.

"This is the best relationship I've ever had," Riario said in a choked voice. "And it’s not even real."

"Hey, no, don’t say that." Zo took Riario's hand, rubbed at his knuckles. He felt a touch of relief that Riario had raised the issue. Zo had not wanted to press the matter, worried about the outcome, but now he realised that they should have discussed this and saved both of them some of this anxiety. "It's real if we want it to be. I want it to be."

"So do I."

"Well then! You had me worried for a moment. I was starting to think you didn't mean those kisses," Zo teased. He pressed his lips to Riario's temple.

Riario was not fully reassured. "But that's all we've done. Kiss. Shouldn't it be more?"

Zo shook his head. "After you stood up to Lorenzo I thought you understood that there's more to a relationship than physical intimacy."

"But don't you need more? Want more?"

"Need, no. Want? I'd like to go further," Zo said. With his free hand he reached up to caress Riario's hair. "But only if and when you want to. Boundaries, remember?"

Riario nodded. "I'd like to – to try and go a little further."

"All right," Zo said. "Then we will."

That night Riario, in boxers and a t-shirt, climbed into Zo's bed. Zo was wearing only skimpy briefs, and that only to reassure Riario that this wasn't going to go further than he was ready for.

They experimented a little, cautious but becoming bolder. Lots of kissing, some caressing, Zo teasing Riario's nipples beneath the shirt, Riario biting down on Zo's earlobe which elicited a moan of pleasure.

"I think that might be my kink," Riario confessed.

"Ears or biting?"

"The latter."

Zo gave a throaty laugh. "All right. Go gentle though?"

Riario licked and nipped his way down Zo's neck and shoulder, enjoying himself.

"What about you? What would you like me to do more of?" Zo asked.

Riario held out one hand and Zo took it pressed kisses to his knuckles, turned it over to run his tongue across Riario's palm before he kissed the softer skin. Zo licked at Riario's thumb, nipped it gently, suckled at it. It wasn't the weirdest kink he'd ever come across and while he found it a little amusing that this of all things was Riario's ideal intimacy it was also new and exciting and beautiful in its relative innocence.

When they'd had enough exploration, they snuggled up, despite the difficulties of two people in a bed intended for one, and slept well.

*

Leo was half-dressed when Zo visited him. Nico was fully dressed and swearing because his tablet had "fucked up the formatting" on his essay which was due later that day.

"I need to tell you something," Zo said, moving a pile of clothing so he could perch on the wooden chair. "About Riario."

"He's a robot assassin from the future," Leo suggested.

"Leo!"

"He said the same thing to Riario's face the other day," Nico offered in-between jabbing at the screen. "Riario put on his sunglasses and dead-panned 'Leonardo da Vinci? I'll be back.' It was awesome."

Zo laughed. "Okay, but be serious for a moment. Riario...he's my boyfriend."

"Faux boyfriend," Leo said.

"No. Not anymore."

Nico put aside the tablet, stunned.

"I'm not entirely sure how it happened," Zo said, uneasy now his friends were both focussed on him. "But it's not fake now. I care about him. I…I love him."

Leo gave a wide grin. "I wondered when you'd realise. Riario feels the same?"

Zo shook his head. "It's real for him, too. But we're still going slow. I haven't said the L-word to him yet. I don't want to scare him. This is all new to him."

"I get it," Leo said. "You need to be careful. But I'm glad you're happy. And you're a good influence on him. He's much less uptight these days."

"I'm glad too," Nico said. "Fuck it, I'm taking this to Clarice. She can fix any document in under thirty minutes or so she says."

Nico left. Zo turned his attention back to Leo.

"You're not jealous?"

"Why would I be? We love each other but we don't work, not as a couple. You deserve to be happy, Zo, and so does he. Riario needs someone who'll be patient and understanding while he figures things out and that's you. I can't think of anyone more patient and loyal. You put up with me."

Zo laughed and got to his feet. "That's true."

"Besides, he's like a tidy, dark-haired version of me," Leo said. "If anything I'm flattered. Thinking of which, he's an artist too. You need to encourage his photography more. I know his classes are all designed to make him into an international businessman or some shit, and maybe he's good at it, but it's not where his heart is."

"I'm trying."

Leo smiled and pulled on a t-shirt. "I know you are. Very trying."

"That's you, asshole."

Leo laughed. He hugged Zo. "Be happy," he said.


	4. Chapter 4

Zo looked up from his laptop when the door flew open and Giuliano dragged a bloodied Riario inside.

"What the fuck?" Zo demanded, tossing his laptop aside. He moved to slip one arm around Riario and began to assess the damage. Riario winced when Zo cupped his chin. "Fuck."

"I'm fine," Riario said, but he neither looked or sounded fine.

"He wouldn't let me take him to the health centre," Giuliano said.

"I'm fine," Riario said again. "I just want to get cleaned up." He staggered away from Zo and went to the bathroom.

"What happened?"

"Lorenzo," Giuliano said, looking wretched.

"Your fucking brother is out of control," Zo yelled.

"I know!" Giuliano ran his hands over his hair, the picture of despair. "I don't know what happened. Ever since he grew that beard..."

"I don't think his facial hair is to blame!" Zo glanced over to the bathroom. He wanted to see to Riario more than he wanted to yell at Giuliano who wasn't actually the person who needed to be yelled at here. "Thanks for bringing him home, at least."

Giuliano, eyes downcast, left. Zo picked up his phone and called Leo. "I need you over here," he said. "Code blue."

With any luck Leo would remember that Code Blue was "I need medical attention without actually getting attention from medical professionals" and not "I'm in trouble with the authorities" which they'd agreed ought to be Code Red and led to the flushing of expensive substances and grabbing hold of Nico who was stupid enough to be a law major whose expertise they valued.

When Zo went into the bathroom, Riario was crouched down at the bottom of the shower, letting the water wash away the blood and shame. His clothing was discarded on the floor and Zo felt a twinge of fear and anger at the sight of the bloodied shirt.

Zo crouched down near the shower. "You all right?"

"Yes." Riario lifted his head, water pouring from his shaggy fringe. "I heal quickly."

"What happened?"

Riario smoothed back his hair, lifted his bruised face into the spray for a long moment. "Lorenzo put his arm around Vanessa. I could see she was uncomfortable. I asked him to stop. He said it was none of my business. He asked why I cared, since I was a fucking faggot."

"Jesus," Zo hissed.

"I told him to let Vanessa go or I would make him. He shoved her aside and came at me. I got in one punch but he's strong. He got in a couple of good punches before Giuliano showed up and dragged him off. He begged Vanessa not to call security which she was in the middle of doing." 

Riario reached up, winced. Zo saw the bruising on his ribs. He moved to turn off the shower, wordlessly handed Riario a towel.

"Help me up," Riario said hoarsely. Zo got him up and out of the shower, wrapping the towel around his hips. He pressed a kiss to Riario's forehead, keeping away from the bruising, then led Riario to the bedroom and got him to sit on the bed.

Leo finally showed up with supplies. He made appropriately shocked noises and sympathetic faces, probing Riario's injuries.

"I think it's mostly bruising," Leo said, deftly applying a sharp smelling liquid to a cut on Riario's chin. Riario hissed but Leo paid him no mind. "Let me put some salve on them. All natural goods, guaranteed to help the healing process."

"Any natural marijuana?" Riario retorted as Leo skilfully rubbed the greasy ointment into his ribs.

"I can hook you up," Leo began.

"Not right now," Zo put in. "Are you sure nothing's broken?"

"Sure as I can be without an x-ray," Leo said. "Possible hairline fractures but I can wrap the ribs if you're worried. Keep an eye out for any major swelling or breathing difficulties or coughing up blood. But I think some painkillers and sleep will probably do the world of good."

Zo folded his arms. "Fucking Lorenzo."

Leo agreed. "We're done here," he said at last and smiled at Riario. "You'll be fine."

With that, Leo said that he was going to go and check out the gossip about Lorenzo and left them alone.

Zo found his largest and softest jersey and made Riario put it on, along with some sweatpants. Riario poured them large glasses of whisky - "A traditional medicine and known painkiller" - and settled himself back on the bed, leaning on the pillows.

"Don't do that again," Zo said, perched on the edge of the bed and nursing his drink.

"Try to protect Vanessa?"

Zo winced. "No. Get yourself hurt. I'm not angry you wanted to do the right thing I'm just...look, I don't like seeing you like this."

Riario tipped his head. "I told you, I heal quickly."

Zo leaned over and kissed him. "I wish you didn't have to," he said. "You scared me, showing up bloody like that. You know how much I care about you."

"How much?" Riario asked hoarsely.

Zo drained the glass, tossed it aside to land safely on his bed opposite them. "I love you," he said, and kissed Riario again.

Riario returned the kiss. "Do you mean that?" he asked when they parted.

Zo nodded and, emboldened, said, "I love you, Girolamo. I fucking love you."

For a moment he thought he'd gone too far and then Riario, clearly emotional, said, "I think I love you too."

Zo didn't even care about the "think". He cared that Riario could say the words at all. He cared that Riario accepted his declaration of love.

They had to be careful of Riario's ribs when they slept that night, but once Riario was comfortable, Zo spooned him, one arm draped over him, and neither would have had it any other way.

*

Next morning saw Vanessa fussing over Riario as he sat on the edge of his bed, Giuliano standing nearby looking contrite, while Zo had the chair by the desk and a pacing Leo told them all the news.

"Lorenzo's gone," Leo said. "Kicked out. He pushed Clarice too far this time and so she reported that he hadn't just been cheating on her but off her. She's been writing his essays for months. Cried about it – she could do drama if she wanted – claimed he threatened her and has been abusive for months. She got a warning and the offer of some sessions with a counsellor while Lorenzo has been thrown out on his ear."

"Good riddance," Zo said. "Sorry, Giuliano."

Giuliano shook his head. "After he laid hands on Vanessa I was furious," he said. "If Clarice hadn't done what she did I might have done something worse. Thank you, Girolamo. I'm sorry he hurt you."

"I could not idly stand by," Riario said. Vanessa kissed his hair and then she and Giuliano left.

Leo sat down on Zo's bed. "Last relationship study meeting this week."

"Yeah."

"And then it's over," Leo said.

Zo and Riario exchanged a glance.

"The study, I mean," Leo went on. "Or are you two still trying to pretend you're not actually in a relationship?"

Zo got up and moved to sit by Riario, slipping one arm around him. "It's a big thing for us, Leo. For Girolamo especially."

"I get that. But without the study you won't have a reason to keep up the pretence. Wouldn't it be better to tell everyone it's real?"

Riario swallowed. "I agree," he said. "But I am more private than you are. And this is has been a difficult thing to admit even to myself."

Leo nodded. "Not everyone is as loud and proud as I am."

"Thank goodness," Riario quipped.

*

Riario was quiet for the next couple of days and Zo didn't push for details. He made conversation when he could, they watched a movie together ("Princess Bride" was a surprising find, both choosing it as a favourite), they studied together and alone, and sometimes Zo slept in Riario's bed.

"Let's push the beds together," Riario said in frustration after Zo almost fell out of bed and elbowed him in his still healing ribs in an attempt to regain his balance.

So they moved the bedside drawer units and pushed the two single beds together. Zo even purchased a double duvet and a set of bedding; double sheet, duvet cover and matching pillowcases, to make it seem more like a double. The arrangement was more than satisfactory.

The final relationship study meeting went smoothly. They were interviewed alone and then together. This time Riario held Zo's hand because he wanted to, not to sell a lie.

They received their payment and thanks for the participation. There was one last form, a questionnaire which asked for their opinion on the study and how it had been conducted. Zo and Riario both ticked boxes and wrote notes and were still finishing the form when Dani and Sylvia joined them.

The girls laughed and teased each other as they filled in the forms.

"The money," Sylvia said, as she ticked a few boxes. "That was a positive outcome!"

"More than that," Dani protested. "We already talk a lot but I think this study made us really dig deep into our relationship. I think it's stronger for that."

Sylvia kissed her in agreement. "What about you boys? Did you learn from the study?"

"Absolutely," Zo said.

"This was a valuable exercise I am glad to have participated in," Riario said, writing that final sentence in the Any Other Comments box.

"So," Zo said, as they left the building. "Study is over."

"Yes."

"But not us." Zo needed to be reassured.

"No." Riario came to a halt. He grabbed Zo's face in both hands, kissed him. "I love you."

Zo was taken aback by the sudden and public display of affection but he smiled. "I love you too."

"You're still meeting Leo?"

Zo nodded. "He wants me to pose for some sculpture we both know he'll never finish."

Riario smiled. "I'll see you later then."

There was a goodbye kiss and they parted.

*

Zo got back to the room at 7pm. He expected to find Riario there as it wasn't one of his nights to work at the library but the room was empty.

Maybe he was studying with Nico, or Clarice? They'd all been sure to look after Clarice, because while she'd exaggerated Lorenzo's violence towards her, it was still an adjustment to be free of him and able to make her own choices without fear.

Zo saw the folded piece of paper carefully placed against his pillow and his heart sank. Surely Riario wasn't leaving him?

Don't be ridiculous, he told himself. Riario hadn't even packed and just a few hours ago he'd been saying how much he loved Zo. Still, his hand trembled as he picked up the note and read it.

Zo grabbed his phone and dialled.

*

Giuliano, the only one of them who owned a car, drove. Leo had sold his ancient vehicle for scrap in order to buy more art materials and Zo had a scooter but he was not riding off to the rescue on it.

Zo sat in the passenger seat, fingers drumming against his thigh. They'd googled where Riario's father Alessandro lived and put the address into the SatNav. Vanessa had stayed behind so long as Giuliano promised to remain in the car and let her know the moment they were safe. Leo argued about coming with them but he was still covered in clay and not allowed anywhere near Giuliano's car.

"What kind of message is that," Zo complained again. Riario's neat script had been brief and to the point. _I am going to visit my father and extricate myself from his grasp once and for all. I do not anticipate any problems. However if I am not back by 8pm you should notify the authorities._

Zo was not going to wait until 8pm to do anything, especially since Riario had ignored his calls and desperate messages. He was going to find Riario and give him a talking to about disappearing like that instead of giving Zo the chance to go with him - or talk him out of it, or something! And then hold him close and try to never let him go.

"It will be all right," Giuliano said. "I'm sure they just have things to discuss."

Then why hadn't Riario told Zo he was going? Zo didn't like it and he wouldn't be happy until he saw Riario safe and sound.

Giuliano parked up and Zo got out, pausing with one hand on the door.

"Not to add to the drama, but if I'm not back in fifteen minutes you should probably call the police."

"If I don't call Vanessa by then she will probably beat me to it," Giuliano said.

Zo left him listening to the radio and strode up to the house. It wasn't a gated mansion out in the country but it was imposing nonetheless and he half expected to be set upon by guard dogs. Zo knocked repeatedly on the door, making it clear he was there and not leaving until someone answered.

The door swung open. A man stared at him. Of course Alessandro would have a butler.

"Zoroaster de Peretola," Zo announced as if he were a crown prince. "Here for Girolamo Riario."

The butler reluctantly allowed him into the opulent hallway, all black and white tiles and gold picture frames, and bade him wait. Zo waited only until he saw which room the man was going to before he dashed down the corridor and burst into the room.

This was the study or maybe a library; a large desk, lots of bookcases, a fireplace with two armchairs either side of it. Riario was standing by the fireplace. Zo's relief at seeing him faded at the mark on Riario's face. He'd healed rapidly from the blows Lorenzo had given him and this bruise was new.

Alessandro was stood near his desk. He was wearing a white nightshirt and white quilted dressing gown along with what Zo assumed was not a beanie hat but a matching nightcap as if he were something out of a regency era movie. The anachronistic feel was underlined when Alessandro shook a fist at Zo. Any minute now he might suggest pistols at dawn.

"Leave us," Alessandro snapped at the apologetic butler while Zo moved to stand by Riario's side.

"You shouldn't be here," Riario said wretchedly.

"I should have been here before he laid a finger on you," Zo said. He glared at Alessandro, one hand balling into a fist. "Want to go a couple of rounds with me? I hit back and I've been in more than my share of fistfights."

"No," Riario begged. Zo shook his head. It dawned on him that Riario hadn't done much to defend himself against Lorenzo because he was used to taking a beating. _I heal quickly_ ; well that too might be from all his past bruises. It explained Riario's shrugging off the injuries as minor inconveniences.

Zo put one hand on Riario's shoulder. "Then let's just go."

"You think you can take my son? You sodomite!"

Zo gave a harsh laugh. "Sodomite? Who even says that anymore? And who gives a shit?"

Alessandro blinked at Zo's coarseness.

"Girolamo is an adult who can make his own decisions," Zo said. "You can't keep him here, no matter how much you disapprove of his choices."

"You do not want to make an enemy of me!"

Zo sighed. "I think I already have. And again, really not giving a shit. Girolamo, come on. Please come home with me?"

At the question, Riario stirred. He gave a sharp nod and Zo slipped an arm around him. They walked out of the house, Alessandro's threats of retribution following them, the butler glaring as he held the door for them, slamming it once they'd left.

"Don't ever leave me like that again," Zo said as he led Riario to the car. "I was worried sick."

"I had to," Riario said weakly. "I needed to let him know I'm not his perfect son, straight and biddable. I've made some calls to my solicitor and an independent financial advisor. There are provisions, even if my father disowns me as he was threatening to do. Money that is rightfully mine. I have enough to pay my tuition, our accommodation fees, and buy some equipment, with a little left over. The cash from the study and my work at the library will allow for some luxuries. Dinner with my boyfriend for example."

Zo was not so easily charmed. "You couldn't have phoned him and said, hey Dad, guess what, I'm not heterosexual?"

"I thought it was a conversation best had in person," Riario said as he climbed into the back seat. Zo went to the other side of the car and climbed in next to Riario.

"Jesus, what happened to you?" Giuliano asked, seeing Riario's bruised face in the rear-view mirror."

Riario shrugged. "I slipped."

"He won't slip again. Ever," Zo said. "Call Vanessa and then let's get out of here, yeah?"

While Giuliano did as he was told, Zo took Riario's hand.

"I would have come with you."

"I know. I suppose I was worried. About your safety. About what he'd say to you. The names he called me before you arrived...I am ashamed of him." Riario shook his head.

Zo squeezed his fingers. "I can handle myself and any amount of insults. I will always want to be at your side. And I know you are not your father." He laughed. "What the hell was he wearing anyway?"

Riario laughed too, albeit a little shaky. He'd be all right once they were home. Zo would bathe the injury and comfort him with kisses and kind words, and they'd sleep in each others arms.

"You should thank him really," Zo said as Giuliano stopped at a red light.

"How so?" Riario asked, puzzled.

"If he hadn't cut you off you wouldn't have needed the relationship study money and we wouldn't be together."

"True."

"Why did he cut you off?"

Riario swallowed. "I told him I wasn't sure business was where my future lay. I mentioned psychology, archaeology; things he might still approve of. It was major in business or law, he said, and unless I promised to stick to those and did well in my current classes to prove my commitment, I would be disowned. I wasn't even serious about those subjects, I was merely testing the waters."

"What were you actually thinking of?"

Riario gave a wry smile. "Media. Photography. Hence the need to buy more equipment."

Zo laughed. "So you'll be switching some of your subjects?"

"Absolutely."

"You still have to help me with my Italian translations."

Riario nodded. "Of course, _amore mio_ ".

*

That they didn't have to hide the relationship any longer still involved a lot of coming out as more people noted their public displays of affection, how each talked about the other as "my boyfriend". Zo saw the slight twitch every time Riario had to explain himself again. It would be a while before he was fully comfortable with being openly, if not precisely gay - he was still questioning, had gladly accepted that label when they'd talked more about it - then obviously not heterosexual.

"I wish everyone knew so they didn't have to keep bringing it up," Zo said.

"I have an idea," Leo said.

Leo's idea consisted of circulating a photo of the two of them he'd taken on his phone, with a caption, some hashtags and emojis about the man who'd stood up to the bully Lorenzo.

It was rather nice that Leo had labelled Riario as HERO even if Zo was just AND BOYFRIEND as the photo made its way around the campus. It cut down on the coming out conversations even if it drew a different kind of attention.

"I could take a better photograph," Riario groused, which was the only complaint he had about it, and Zo challenged him to prove it.

A discreet black and white photo of Riario and Zo soon graced the wall of the dorm room, and a larger full colour one of them that included Leo, Vanessa, Giuliano, and Nico soon joined it.

"I think you've found your passion," Zo said, one arm around Riario's waist. He nuzzled at Riario's ear as they admired the photograph.

"Yes," Riario said, taking Zo's free hand and pressing kisses to his knuckles. "I think I have."

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Every Moment it Takes](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14106993) by [meridian_rose (meridianrose)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/meridianrose/pseuds/meridian_rose)




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